1. |
Malice
04:57
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Amends and dead ends
Hold your heart like a martyr
What a shame oh what a shame
We've been left here to suffer
Three years took a part of me
Once blind but now I see
That everything that was wrong with me was brought on by complacency
I was getting high on constant fights and losing count of sleepless nights, I wandered endlessly.
Knowing every second that I was I torn between what I thought I wanted and what I need.
Truest colours slip into a shade of grey
Sever the ties, forget my name
For all the times I lay awake at night, when tossing and turning you corrupt my mind
I trusted myself I would end this, sever the ties
I see the holes in all your promises and lies within the words you said
You can't look me in the eyes and expect me to forget
I stood beside you when I knew I should have walked away
The truest colours always fucking turn to grey
What a shame oh what a shame
We've been left here to suffer
Fuck
Waste my time
It all ends the same
That old bitter taste
Thrown back in my face
I was getting high on constant fights and losing count of sleepless nights, I wandered endlessly.
Knowing every second that I was I torn between what I thought I wanted and what I need.
What a waste, what a waste
You chose to throw this away
Looking back I though that we were the same
What a waste, what a waste
You chose to throw this away
How is it that you feel no shame
I can taste the lies on your breath
The spark has faded, our sun has set
That old bitter taste, thrown back in my face
White noise in my head has now faded away
I gave you everything you want now forget my name
I got caught, I was lost in your bullshit
You're a fake you're a snake and the whole word knows it
We are nothing the same
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2. |
Relapse
03:35
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Forgive me father for I have sinned like I do time and time again.
It's got the best of me, but it's what you would have wanted I promise.
Its pulling me under
I'm in too deep,
I don't want to feel a fucking thing.
I hurt myself on the outside to kill the things inside of me
Stuck halfway between sacrifice and sanity
At the bottom of a bottle or with a noose around my neck, ive come to terms, there's only one way this will end.
I can feel my demons scratching at my skin and I've tried so hard but ill never win
I'll never fucking win.
It's got the best of me, I'm in, too fucking deep
It's got the best of me, but it's what you would have wanted
At the bottom of a bottle or with a noose around my neck, I've come to terms there's only one way this will end.
I'm in too deep, I don't want to feel a thing
To forget the regrets I'll slip up and relapse.
Im far too proud to ever try and ask for help, so I'll fill my lungs and drown in my own hell
Forgive me father for I have sinned
Like I do time and time again
IIl keep going until the room spins
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3. |
Hold Your Breath
03:48
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I know we bleed the same
But my head is fucked and I love the pain
I feed on empathy
So come, gather round
Give me what I need
Parasite
I've got a lot on my mind and a lot to get out
But when I open my mouth my mind starts to doubt
The depth and worth of the words that I speak
Will they ever lead to the answers I seek?
Watch me fall at your feet now
Hear a beggar's plea
Break me
Break my back and watch me fall
Underneath
You'll see my true intent unfold
There's no illusion behind blatant deceit
So when the curtain calls
I'll have to stand to my feet
And take hold
Take a hold of all my vices
Take a hold of the black in me
Knock a hole in my defences
And set all my captives free
Though I'm not a perfect person
I hope to God you'll see
My will to overcome is enough to
Pull me out from underneath
A moment of silence could set me alight
The mistakes that I've made bring dead ends to life
So hold back my breath; let my eyes see straight
This disposition won't be the death of me
Sick sick, sick sick
The only answer I'm given is sick, sick, sick
I'm not a victim I'm only a captive
Tied down by a world of distraction
Break me
Break my back and watch me fall
Underneath
Watch as the world condemns me
Silent suffering
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4. |
A Cold Sense Of Clarity
03:30
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A hollow life that's tried to give a purpose.
Was it all for nothing, is it all a waste?
Every fucking second of everyday.
Sick thoughts that I'm worthless,
Killing time until the grave.
God won't answer me.
Death haunts my sleep.
Time goes slow when you live in fear as everything you love slowly disappears.
Cursed and aware, grown bitter in 20 years.
Was it all for nothing, is it all a waste.
Slip into the aether, waste away.
In the end what will come of us, buried six feet and fucking left to rot
We are nothing special, born from dust.
Over and over it keeps me awake
We were born into a noose, can you hear my bones break?
I try and I try but I can't run away from a cold sense of clarity. Death haunts me.
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5. |
Stockholm Syndrome
04:31
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I cant believe the thought of death came to mind because of you
How stupid was i to trust your words of "truth"?
I've checked myself, lost respect aswell
Just to keep my sanity
I've lost all hope in me
For all the lies
And all the pain you caused
For all the cries
Do you have no shame at all
You're comatosed in your own resentment
Oh god i hope its worth it
Look how far you've come
Since you escaped your vice
Restless with good intentions
I lay awake at night
I've seen what you are hiding
You can't apologise
For every night you kept me up
giving a fuck
You cant run you cant hide
From all the pain you caused
You're the weak one here
You've lost your fucking mind
For all the lies
And all the pain you caused
For all the cries
Do you have no shame at all
For all the lies
And all the pain
Foe all the cries
With no shame
No trust left to give
No life left to live
No one to have your back
You'll have to face the facts
My heads been spinning for days
These clouded thoughts haunt my brain
I feel im wasting away
Why cant you turn the page?
I can't believe
The thought of death
Came to mind
Because of you
How stupid was i
to trust your words of "truth"?
I've checked myself,
Lost respect aswell
Just to keep my sanity
I've lost all hope in me
I've lost all hope in me
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